


Very Weird Crap

by orphan_account



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Gen, What Did I Just Write, what the frick is this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-05
Updated: 2019-12-05
Packaged: 2021-02-26 00:20:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 911
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21684391
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: I really don't know what I've just written. But it's weird.There's a short faucet fight.
Kudos: 5





	Very Weird Crap

"You can order me all you want, Russia, but I am not cleaning this basement. Nuh uh. No way in hell. Do it yourself." You stubbornly crossed your arms.  
Russia's aura grew. The Baltics had already retreated a long time ago, and it was filling the entire hallway now.  
"Kol kol kol kol kol kol..."  
Well, no. Nope. Nopety nope nope. No cracking at all costs. Hell naw.  
You continued glaring at him, maintaining eye contact. He slowly pulled out his Magical Metal Pipe of Pain™. But you'd prepared for this situation, oh yes. You now also had a faucet. You slowly pulled it out as well. The scene probably looked ridiculous – two people standing with faucets at the ready, in sword-fighting stances. Estonia peeked around the far corner of the hallway, but, seeing the huge aura, decided to quickly get back out of there. Your faucets clashed against each other, neither of you faltering. You two stood like that for a while, trying to win by sheer force, but it was fruitless as you were equal in power. Both of you simultaneously withdrew your weapons, then clashing them again. You were pretty sure Russia's aura has now reached the second floor, which is an accomplishment since it's quite far away from the hallway you were in.  
You did a somersault in the air, landing on your feet and starting to run towards Russia, with various ゴゴゴゴ and ドドドド in the air around you. He held his faucet out, preparing to block your hits and then land some of his own.  
You did a somersault again, jumping over him and landing a hit. He grunted, turning around and starting to use his scarf. It kinda looked like tentacles. You probably would've laughed if you weren't in a life-threatening situation.  
Russia's eyes looked extremely scary, and the murderous intent was everywhere by now. The thoughts of "uh... was... was that... such a good idea to fight him? *nervous laugh*" were starting to creep into your mind, but you figured it was too late to turn back now, so you prepared your faucet. That’s when an idea came to you. Usually Russia himself was the person to always creep the others out, but who creeped him out? That’s right, Belarus. You were jerked back to reality by one end of his scarf grabbing onto you and starting to swing you around. Your thoughts were all similar to “oh fuck oh shit I’m so screwed”, you were frantically trying to find a way out of this, and that's when you noticed a white bow made out of a ribbon. And the only person that could be wearing this is Belarus.  
You smirked. ”Oh boy,” you thought, “you’re done for.”  
You knew Belarus really wasn’t a person you’d want to interact a lot with, but you figured it would eventually come in handy if you knew her, since Russia was practically terrified of her. Plus, when you actually got to know her, she turned out to be a pretty cool person who’s just a bit obsessed with her brother. A bit. A… bit…  
But nevermind that. You had to solve the problem at hand, and you needed some air for that, so you waited for a moment when the scarf calmed down a bit, breathed in and yelled “Belarus!”  
Russia’s face twisted in horror. You were pretty sure he was trying to quickly decide whether to leave you here or carry you with him on his scarf. But the route to escape was already unusable, because Belarus had seen him.  
“Brother!”  
Russia’s face displayed the “oh shit” that was running through your head just a while ago. It was incredibly satisfying to watch his expression change from a creepy smile, to a look of confusion that passed after a second, to a scared one, to an expression of horror. You both knew the glass in the window was not going to separate them for long.  
The screeches of “Brother” were getting more frequent and loud. The glass was trembling. You started the countdown.  
“10. 9. 8. 7.”  
Russia was still trying to find a way to escape.  
“4. 3. 2.”  
His attempts were getting more and more desperate.  
“1. 0.”  
Belarus burst through the window.  
Russia dropped you.  
It all happened so suddenly that your brain didn’t even really immediately realise exactly what just happened. One second, the window was breaking, and the other, Belarus was trying to catch a very scared Russia. It was really getting hilarious. You quietly snickered.  
You decided it was your cue to get out of there, since you knew from experience what was going to happen next. Russia also knew, and he was not happy about it.  
You quietly crept along the wall to the stairs, and then to your room. You listened to his screams of "KAETTEEE!" for a while, eventually becoming bored of it and plopping down on your bed. You quickly changed into your pyjamas, dusting your legs off, and then you jumped on your bed, bouncing on it a few times. Grabbing your favourite book that you always left on your bedside table, you got comfortable under the covers, opened the book and sighed contently. Then, you proceeded to bury your nose into the glorious book that you were immensely enjoying reading, with Russia’s screams in the background, smiling deviously. Today really was such a satisfying day, wasn’t it?

**Author's Note:**

> rly tho, what did i even write
> 
> Feedback needed and much appreciated. Thank you.


End file.
